Hi internet—it’s been a minute. Let’s catch up.
The past month has been an incredibly bittersweet time. Many important chapters of my life have come to a close, not only including my graduation from Loyola Marymount University (yay!) but also the publication of the very last issue of my magazine, Mad Sounds.
Aside from this official ‘welcome’ into the adult world™, my decision to stop publishing my magazine was something that came as a surprise to many, as Mad Sounds had become a project of mine that had not only paved the way for many of my opportunities throughout college, but defined a large part of my identity as a creator and artist. Although I don’t plan to dedicate an entire blog post to this topic, there’s a few reasons why I decided to stop the magazine that I will break down…briefly:
image by @nycbambi
1. I was really, really burnt out. I published the magazine consistently for five years, working on thirty issues and managing a digital website. As most full-time students experience, I had reached a point where I found myself with little time or creative energy to dedicate to such a highly produced publication every month, especially while taking a full load of classes. I was tired, and I needed a break.
2. I recognized that Mad Sounds, like most things, had an expiration date. I knew that, realistically, the magazine wasn’t meant to last forever.
3. I grew out of it—and I realized that this fact is okay. I will always have a passion for creating, consuming, and making art, but my interest in the way I create art has certainly evolved as I’ve grown older. Instead of making a magazine or producing the same content as Mad Sounds, I’ve become interested in working on a creative project that more accurately reflects who I am now as a creative—a project that can fulfill my desire to have an outlet and creative space without spreading me too thin.
And now, that brings us here. Present day. To a newly rebranded and redesigned website.
The layout of the website is notably different: I’ve shifted from more of a business/lifestyle focused blog site to a website intended to be treated as a journal, vision board, and portfolio all in one. A creative dumping ground for anything and everything that inspires me, that I’ve created, written, or photographed, and a place to store the work that I’ve published online. It’s not as SEO friendly. It’s not neat or tidy in any way. But this new space feels like a platform that is more authentically and wholly myself, and this in itself makes me excited to create again.
Life is kind of weird right now—I’m in the process of finding (and hopefully securing) my dream post-grad ‘big girl’ job, I’ve ended a project I’ve worked on for five years, and I’m (still) learning how to reconcile with who I am and who I want to be. I don’t know exactly what the future has in store, but it’s certainly a beautiful place to exist in.
Thanks for coming along for the ride.